a few words from my dog, Dougal.

1. Never accept rejection.
No matter how much someone may scream and flap, that lap is yours.

2. Stoical is not a word, neither is stoic a stable adjective.
The hidden angora blanket is yours.

3. Cleaning will not make you a spiritual person, dreaming will.

Overemphasis on spots and smells defines you as a cat.

4. Smile when it's not natural.

If you think this is difficult as a humanoid, it's moreso as a kelpie/corgie.

5 Explore the assumptions of royal duties.

If you are a 2 legged being, you will probably have little royal value. Corgies, on the other hand, should hold their head high.

6. Never underestimate the beauty of a lost sock.

7. Life without sole is boring.

Gather shoes on your bed, regardless of their original owner's screams and possessive carry on.

8. If you appear to be the same height standing and resting, rest more. But nurture the self worth of a big dog.

9. Choose to hear 'Dougal what are you doing NOW!' as an exclamation of wonder, not a question.

10. That's not a bone, this is a bone!

Negotiating a 3 metre bone and a 1 metre dog flap is only a matter of time and courage. Good bones taste better indoors.